Zucker Punched

Ask me anything  

Because tumblr > the real world. I love humor, broadway, feminism, Disney, more broadway, more feminism, even more broadway, and MATILDA! My Matilda: Ava Ulloa on 2/15/14. 17, awkward, Jewish, freckled, curly haired Midwesterner who dreams of sipping Starbucks in Times Square in line at TKTS.


notbroadwaybound:

the-broadway-babe:

Yours truly made a beeline for the Matilda table and got the only opening night gift they had. I’m so excited - I’ve been hunting for one forever!

What is it and how does it relate to opening night? :O

— 2 hours ago with 22 notes

truckyousasha:

septemberwildflowers:

jewist:

the worst is having a dream where someone loves you and you can practically feel them touching you and it feels so real and then you wake up and it’s like the life is being sucked out of you and the happiness just drains out of your body and you feel empty again

the fact that over 300,000 other people know exactly what this feels like too is a source of great comfort

especially if it’s a kiss

(via brandonfandomer)

— 2 hours ago with 798745 notes

miscellaneouschaos:

gengarites:

ruinedchildhood:

let’s not forget how mertil’s dad abandoned her

THAT DOESNT EXCUSE HER FROM BEING A HUGE BITCH HOLY SHIT THERE ARE PLENTY OF KIDS WHOSE DADS ABANDON THEM & AREN’T EVIL?????

Lilo’s parents fucking died.

(Source: ruinedchildhood, via brandonfandomer)

— 2 hours ago with 182080 notes

onceandfuturewinchester:

dweebscar:

dweebscar:

dweebscar:

dweebscar:

i just hid 27 of these little bastards around the house
image

and im waiting for my parents reaction

 ”WHY THE SHIT IS THERE A CHICKEN IN MY COFFEE CUP”
the first chicken has been found

“amiee we think you have a problem” my parents say as they hold 15 tiny chickens in their hands

1000 notes because i terrorized my family with small chickens

this is fucking hilarious

(via gracefulplatypus)

— 2 hours ago with 284260 notes
Observations

that3gyptian:

A lot of the smoking ads I’ve seen lately focus primarily on the fact that smoking causes premature wrinkles on your face, all while disregarding the internal damage that it also causes. It seems like the only way to get a message across to society is by warning against the potential aesthetic damage. Forget strokes, cancer, breathing issues - you’re gonna get wrinkles around your eyes! And suddenly, it’s supposed to hit you harder than an image of blackened lungs. 

— 2 hours ago with 3 notes

leenahall:

leenahall:

My aaronconda don’t

image

My aaronconda don’t

image

My aaronconda don’t want none unless you got buns hun

image

When people ask what killed me, just show them this stupid fucking post

— 2 hours ago with 1212 notes
smartgirlsattheparty:

Submission from our Facebook Page: Smart Girls at the (8th Birthday) Party! The girls and their moms painted self-portraits and added positive adjectives to them :) 
We love this idea! 

smartgirlsattheparty:

Submission from our Facebook Page: Smart Girls at the (8th Birthday) Party! The girls and their moms painted self-portraits and added positive adjectives to them :) 

We love this idea! 

— 2 hours ago with 33 notes

riddlersgammon:

that time of year is approaching

scary lawn decorations

terrifying tv programs

people in costumes going door to door

election season

(via thomasjamesmatthew)

— 2 hours ago with 99472 notes

Almost there…

(Source: truthteas, via scottsonnier)

— 3 hours ago with 7169 notes
me:i don't even care. i'm not going to talk about this anymore.
...
me:and you know what else? [2000 word rant]
— 3 hours ago with 139802 notes

slotato:

boomitsnialler:

if it makes you feel any better this picture of me is in my high school yearbook and half my teachers came up to me and congratulated me on having the most embarrassing one and said they all laughed about it at a faculty meeting 

image

are you raven symone

(Source: okaywork, via gracefulplatypus)

— 3 hours ago with 352868 notes
Have you ever had *whispers* unprotected sex?

sashaforthewin:

fishingboatproceeds:

Four different people asked this.

Guys.

I HAVE A CHILD.

I laughed at this

then I notice it was John Green

then I laughed harder

(via gracefulplatypus)

— 3 hours ago with 223702 notes